The Price Of VirginityThis topic had been on my mind for a very long time. Its a touchy subject for some but i believe that its something most of us will think of. Especially in this current critical society of ours, everything we do is closely scrutinised.
Lately i came across a post on a forum. This guy was asking people about their opinions about their girlfriend or spouse being a non-virgin. He loves this gal and the gal loves him too. The gal initiated sex with him. However after the deed he realised that the gal was not a virgin and he cant bring himself to accept the fact that hes not the first guy she has bedded. A few readers have also asked me on what i think about virginity before.
Before we continue, let us go back to the start of this problem. Back to the ancient ages. This was the period when virginity was prized. The emperors of old china conducted virginity checks on their future concubines or empress by checking for the presence of the hymen. Yes, this little piece of skin would decide if the gal enjoys a life of riches or continues to work the land. Rich men conducted such checks too when they take concubines. Thus you can see that the value of virginity was rooted deep in our minds from way back.
Moving on to the present time, the value of virginity has certainly eroded. The influx of other cultures, most notably of western origins plays a big part. Look at shows and even literature now, most of them have at least expressed some form of sexuality. The reason for expressing such sexuality? Most of the time its to attract a certain guy and the end action is a romp on the bed. A classic example will be the James Bond series of movies. Tell me which movie aint ended with Bond shagging a girl? And this is where the value of virginity has slowly eroded. As the society opens up and becomes a potpourri of values and cultures, certain things become lost. Things which were practical becomes a fantasy now.
Part of the reason why some people holds such an attachment to virginity stems from their ego. For guys, they feel that its better to own new stuff rather than own something which has been used before. For gals, they might feel that its better to preserve their virginity for someone they really love. I have no qualms with people who dont approve of premarital sex and saving their virginity till their consummation night. Yes, premarital sex might be common now but it does not mean you have to do it. You guys have your values and views and i respect that. I know its certainly not easy to keep yourself in check given the intricacies and allures from the current society and environment.
However, what i do not like or respect is the fact that people are using the virginity issue to start a relationship or to love someone. Back to the post from the guy in the forum. He says he loves the girl and the girl loves him so much that the girl initiated sex because she knows thats what he wants. However he cant bring himself to love her anymore cos of the fact that shes not a virgin? Give me a break. Take a walk down Orchard Road now, grab a few teens and ask them if they have been bedded or bedded anyone before. Though most of them wont admit it given our prudish society, i will gladly bet that there's a high percentage of them out there who are no longer virgins. I have a few gal pals that i am quite close with and i am their confidante. Two of them lost their virginity at the young age of 15, a few lost it shortly after their 16th birthday. Though this is not an actual representation of the situation out there, you readers can probably take a good estimation.
There are a few reasons why guys cant accept that their gals are non virgins:
Their upbringing
Their ego
There is no way to solve their upbringing problem. Its the way they have been conditioned to live life. Its either they change their life or they let their upbringing live their life for them. The ego problem is the most common obstacle here.
Ego at work: "I cant accept her, shes a used shoe." Ladies here will agree with me that even though a pair of heels look nice, you wont know how it works out until you wear it. Sometimes, you will get blisters wearing it, sometimes it might hurt you after wearing it for a while and sometimes it just plainly dont fit. You got to try it out before you know if its the right shoe for you. Before i get blasted for this blasphemous idea of trying out every gal read on.For gals losing their virginity, it doesnt mean the gal is loose or wild or is a slut. There could be many hidden facets you have never seen. There are always two sides to every story. Ask yourself, why will a girl give up her virginity so easily? Reason being is they love that guy. True, that guy could be backstabbing or two timing that girl, however the girl is innocent. She doesnt know. She thought that the guy really loves her and thats why she decides to give up something so precious. And ladies will agree, you wont even let a guy touch your hand or get intimate with you unless you are really sure that he loves you, much less give him sex. Even if its a fling, there is surely a hint of feeling before they go to bed.
And after loosing their virginity to the guy and finding out that hes a two timer, jerk or bastard, what can a girl do? Nothing, whats done is already done. The most a gal can do is cry about it and be really depressed. However time will heal everything. Then along comes a guy who after a long time, the gal feels that she can really trust and really loves her, she decides to give her love and body to him. Think how hurt she will be if the guy cant accept her cos shes not a virgin. Because of one mistake in life, the girl has to suffer it for eternity? Shes already willing to give her love to you and to block out those horrible memories of her past. What more can a guy ask for? Why cant you just give her another chance to be loved and cared for? Is a piece of skin that important to you? Is the feeling of penetrating her the first time that important to you? Besides, its all in the past. Why bother about the past when you are living in the present?
