当晚与你记住流水声今晚站在大地自己倾听难道送别你回头总是虔诚谁能怪我总是太感性

Friday, November 11, 2005 - 9:51 PM

Finally i understood the chinese proverb meaning of yi(1)shi(1)zhu(2)cheng(2)qian(1)gu(3)hen(4),hui(2)tou(2)yi(3)shi(4)bai(2)nian(2)sheng(1)
can understand or nt?if not msg m eon msn,i tell xlain to u slowly.sometimes,must really watch what you do.out of the sudden,have lotsa flash backs.
dunno why whenever i headache will get all sorts of 'history' flashbacks.

KNN FUCKER
SON OF A BITCH
BASTARD

KNNB CCB FUCKER ASSHOLE
KNNB CCB FUCKER ASSHOLE
KNNB CCB FUCKER ASSHOLE
KNNB CCB FUCKER ASSHOLE
KNNB CCB FUCKER ASSHOLE
KNNB CCB FUCKER ASSHOLE
KNNB CCB FUCKER ASSHOLE
KNNB CCB FUCKER ASSHOLE
KNNB CCB FUCKER ASSHOLE

its not what i want.but i also try to tell myself that things cannot be change already rite..jus wait and see lorr.
The SUCIDAL thoughts seems to re-surface in my mind again.i still remeber what i wrote last time,and i realised how immature i was,may its through incidents,wrong doings that we discover our mistakes adn improve ourselves constantly.

i can only sae from 4am+ until 6am+ until fren msg me,keep on msging,then i keep on trying to explain.finally give up....i keep on having this horrible headache,and terrible flash back.i wish they could get out of my mind.dunno tonite still can sleep or nt.haven slept well since then.i really dunno wad to do.only can pray in the mean time.from tml onwards will start my intensive programme.

whateva the outcome will be,i still wanna live on normally,happily for the time being.yvonne ask me some stuf today.i jus tell her that sometimes i have to be selfish and let the innocent party suffer.what yvonne and ivan say i find its very true...
but partially also my fault also.i admmit.only can blame on my naive and immature mindset.if hoe hwee finds out,dunno what will he think.mayb this mayb that...

i know that this is unfair to that innocent party(if there is any,but i need to make a decison that will affect my life.i hope tt i will nid nt worry on such problems.i feel that this is even worse then the previous wait on results.
waiting on for long painful 14+ days...

i was hoping that listening to some music can help.but now my ipod also gone.no music...

to pple who knows:telling me not to keep on think about it,or dun think about it at all.its impossible fer me to do that.can you like put urself into my shoes and think if you were me.how would you feel if you were me?

ystd was went wu hao's hse play mahjong.or i shall say i watch them play mahjong.then at nite go join fren at club momo there,thurs very very dead lor.actually want to go rush de.but then end up nv go...

momo damn sian,cos nobody.i suaku first time go there lorr...
then my fren decided that momo too sian liao.so finish off the drink then went to his hse lorr.then stay there until 3am+ liddat...then go home liao...